Not the best.

Hello again.

I want to get out of here. It's doing my head in. I have nothing to do, nobody to talk to, nobody to go somewhere with. So I think this is the end. I'm not looking forward to the next 2 weeks. Everyone has got plans and I'm stuck at home doing homework.

I can't be bothered writing anymore, I'm just not in the mood.

So Bye.

The Only One.

So why does it always feel like I'm the only one
The lonely one
And every-body else is the same
I thank you for pointing out where I am going wrong
Keep going wrong
And nothings making sense
Silent screams in my defense

And the best thing about this place
Is it looks good from outer space
But there's nothing
Nothing, here for me
And the rules that you make never let me win
Cos I'm always a freak that can never fit in
Is there some place
Somewhere
Cos the best thing around is the road that leads out of here

Na na na na na na na na na na na na,
Na na na na, na na na na na na na na-a-a-a

Sometimes I wish that I could be a part of it
A part that fits
And people called me by my name
Pretend that I'm fascinated by what's going on
What wars were won
I promise that I'll be nice
And thanks for all your help and advice

And the best thing about this place
Is it looks good from outer space
But there's nothing
Nothing, here for me
And the rules that you make never let me win
Cos I'm always a freak that can never fit in
Is there some place
Somewhere
Cos the best thing around is the road that leads out of here

And when you look back at the photos of everyone
Of everyone
I wonder whatever become of that face
Stuck in the middle of your chart
So say goodbye as I walk
I'll send you a postcard from New York

And the best thing about this place
Is it looks good from outer space
But there's nothing
Nothing, here for me
And the rules that you make never let me win
Cos I'm always a freak that can never fit in
Is there some place
Somewhere
Cos the best thing around is the road that leads out of here

Wasting your time again.

I really do like blogging but it seems like I'm trying to seek attention through my blogs. I don't want it to be that way. All I know is that it won't stop me blogging. To me blogging is like the new type of diary, only difference is that everyone on the net can read it.

I'm really happy that you're happy, I'm not sure if you realized the part of my last blog that was for you or not because you haven't said anything, but I hope you did.

I'm finally getting somewhere I've finally made some great decisions. Hopefully they don't backfire like the rest.

Oh and... I apologize to the people that go to my party in advance, I'm sorry if there's no music you like, if it is extremely boring, and basically if you don't enjoy it.

Hmm.. Ok then.
Bye
Tell you some more of what's happening in my hollow head soon.
Enjoy your day/night.

And here we go again.

I may as well just give up, I'm trying to navigate through a broken path that I may have helped create. There's a voice without a face, should I be afraid or is it just a voice I created. Should I fight it or should I leave it. I won't fight it for now because I don't know what it is.

I don't know what I'm waiting for... I want to know if it's worth the wait. This is going to take some time to know what I'm trying to find. But it wont take too long to figure out right from wrong. Switch off and let it go...

If you didn't notice all that was parts of songs put in to my words.

This part is for you. Honestly. It's nice to know you are there, it's nice to know there's someone who wants to listen. I'll let you know why I don't want to talk face-to-face about what I'm going through... It's because I feel stupid that I get upset and pissed off with all these small things building up inside and knocking me over like a leaf, when there are other people in the world with far worse things going on in their lives. I always thought I was strong and I wouldn't end up like this... Turns out I'm wrong. And that's why you'll probably never realize how much I thank you for everything you've done.

Bye.

Wishes...

I'm going crazy, there's too much to think about so much that confuses me. Gahh, I wish school was over with. I wish I had a job. I wish I had something to describe who I am. I wish I had my own room. I wish I had my own place. I wish I lived down south or in the country somewhere, somewhere that no-one cares what you wear, or what you look like. I would love to be able to go out somewhere in trackies and a jumper and not get weird looks from EVERYONE that sees me.
I wish I could go out and not worry about how much I spend. I wish I knew what the future holds for me. I wish my families would all just talk so it wouldn't be so awkward for me. I wish I was someone else. Yeah I know I have a lot of things I'd wish for so maybe when I find a genie I'll wish for a couple hundred more wishes.

I wish everything was how it used to be, I wish my group of friends weren't falling apart. I wish it was like how it was at the end of year nine. I wish I went to high school with all my friends I grew up with. I wish Woodvale would get over their selves; they aren't that great of a school.

I don't understand why I have to put up with so much shit.
Everyone says I'm hell smart but I don't show it, and I guess it's true.

I love knowing that your always here for me, well you always say that anyway, it's gotten awkward lately, you've seemed to of forgotten the old times, it seems you are sick of it all and you've moved on, it's like the old times are now second possibly even last in your social life, and you've found something else. But I may just be tired and over reacting. Please tell me I am, because I really do miss the old times.

Bye for now.

Friends.

So lately I've been really concerned with a few of my friends.

They aren't happy and it's really obvious. but they wont speak about it. I hate it when I see people like this. But I'm not sure what I can do. I'm fed up sitting there with them about to burst into tears.
Gah! It really annoys me that they think they can't come to me and talk. I don't mind trying to help them, I just don't want to see them like this.